MARTIAN'S MINUTE: June 19, 2019

I skipped the Minute yesterday because I had work in the morning and there wasn't enough pressing "news" to get me out of bed earlier than I had to to type one of these up. As for the intro, I feel like you should have learned to stop expecting things from me at this point. I have the next three days off to figure it out, so let's just hope I do *insert laughing emoji*. I'll do this; I'll update the cover photo. That's a step in the right direction.

Ok, by the time I finished writing this it was 2 PM so uh, yeah, I gotta get this out. The header will be changed tomorrow lol.


Mike Conley Jr. traded to Utah

Our first Shams bomb of the season! Woj has been the first to every scoop so far this offseason so it's refreshing to see his former pupil break something. Mike Conley has seemingly been apart of trade talks for the better part of two seasons and after the Grizzlies moved former cornerstone Marc Gasol to the eventual-champion Raptors at this year's deadline, Conley's departure only felt more inevitable. The Jazz, anchored by stars Rudy Gobert and Donovan Mitchell, have been in the playoffs each of the last two seasons but have yet to make it past the second-round. I'm a big fan of Donovan Mitchell (I was on the ROTY train) and think that he could have an incredibly bright future with the right core around him. Utah has been impressive defensively since drafting Mitchell in 2017 but their offense has never been something to write home about. With Mitchell having to be their first and really only high-volume scorer, the Jazz often stand around and settle for a low-efficiency shot due to spacing issues; what they've desperately needed is a point guard that can take the ball out of Mitchell's hands while aiding him in finding better shots.

There's no doubt that Mitchell is going to be a really, really good player and scorer; hell, he already is. He averaged nearly 24 points per game this season, a nearly 3.5 point increase from his rookie campaign, but did it at a less-than-stellar 43.2% clip, a minute drop from 2017-18. His point guard for his time in Utah has been Ricky Rubio, a solid player, but not someone who's necessarily going to make him a more efficient scorer. That's going to change, obviously, with Mike Conley coming in to run the offense. In 70 appearances last season, Conley put up 21.1 points (43.8-36.4-84.5) and 6.4 assists per night; a definite upgrade over Rubio. His ability to score and knock down threes at a steady rate is going to greatly aide Utah's offensive production and further transition Donovan Mitchell into the All-Star capable player that he's been showing shades of for two years. If you're a Jazz fan, this should be a fun year, especially with the West looking so open.

There's an unreal amount of "reported" drama in Houston

I've talked about the Rockets, primarily James Harden, so much this season. I'm not going to make you suffer (for too long) through more Rockets talk. It was reported that Harden and Chris Paul's relationship is "unsalvageable" and CP3 wants out. CP3 commented "news to me" on an Instagram post about the report yesterday and general manager Daryl Morey said he'll be on the team next year so I don't fully buy it. When you have two "alphas" in the locker room who play virtually the same position, they're going to clash heads (in most cases). The NBA has shown us this throughout the league's existence; egos clash. It's been floated the last couple weeks that everyone sans Harden is available in trade talks but with CP3's age and exorbitant contract, he's essentially immovable. It's much more likely that Eric Gordon or Clint Capela are moved, but unless Houston knows they're getting another star like Jimmy Butler to join or are getting depth-helping players in return, I don't see why they wouldn't largely run back the same team. This offseason has already been wild and free agency hasn't even started. The draft still has to happen! I'm not sure I fully buy into all the Rockets drama because I feel like a lot of locker room drama is created by the media, so unless one of them straight up says "Yeah, I don't fuck with him", we won't really know.


I watched Booksmart and Lady Bird so I think I'm an angsty teen girl now?

Praise Xenu for $5 movie Tuesdays because I'll tell you, it's tough out in these streets right now. Slinging sandwiches just isn't paying for gas like I was hoping so let's hope I can add on some library organization onto my income. I just had my first Starbucks Iced Cold Brew in like a week. I'm not adjusted to such deprivation. Ralph, Hotto, and I made our way to Booksmart, a movie that's been met with super high praise and one I'd been anticipating seeing. Olivia Wilde took the helm in her directorial debut and did a hell of a job. It stars Kaitlyn Dever and Beanie Feldstein (Jonah Hill's sister) as two overachievers realizing that they essentially wasted their high school careers with all work and no play ahead of their graduation.

Both the stars deliver convincing and humorous performances, and the dialogue between the two is so well-done that you feel like a fly on the wall when they're riffing off each other. The supporting cast, which includes the likes of Jason Sudeikis, Will Forte, and Lisa Kudrow, keeps the punches rolling the whole film and the girls' classmates are absolutely hilarious. Everyone perfectly plays their roles and with an excellent screenplay and Wilde's direction, Booksmart will cement itself as a generation's Superbad; it hasn't done massive numbers at the box office, but I feel like this will have legs. The widespread acclaim that's been given to this film is more than deserved and hopefully it will get the recognition it deserves come awards season.

Following our viewing of this, Hotto recommended I watch Lady Bird, and I did just that. Last year's female-driven, universally acclaimed dramedy has been on my list for a while so I'm glad I decided to cross it off. I definitely fell in love with Lady Bird, played by Saoirse Ronan, during it. Beanie Feldstein is also in this, so it looks like she's just going to keep popping up in hits; her and her brother sure know what they're doing. I think I might've liked Lady Bird a bit more than Booksmart, but the disparity wasn't that big. After watching both in like a five hour span, I think it's safe to say that I'm a teenage girl filled with angst that can't wait to get to college in New York to explore my artistic ingenuity and break free from my parents' house aka prison.