Written by Evan Northrup, edited by Ralphy Compiano
Over a year and a half ago fans held on to their seats as the seventh season of Game of Thrones came to an end, giving us some of the most satisfying plot developments in TV history.
Jon Snow is the rightful King, he’s having hot sex with his aunt, and the Night King uses his new dragon thrall Viserion to bring down The Wall. These revelations left viewers with monstrously high expectations for the premiere of Season 8, and this last Sunday, Dave and Dan gave us their last shot at a Game of Thrones season opener.
Here’s a recap of the important events from Season 8 Episode 1, what these events mean, and where they could be leading us.
If there's one thing Throners are positive of, it's that GOT wasted no time in their opening episode. While to some people it may have felt rushed, Dave and Dan took their last opportunity at a season opening episode to create a plentiful base of plot threads and new relationships that will carry us through the whole season.
In King’s Landing, Euron arrives with the Golden Company (minus their elephants), and Cersei lets the swashbuckling punk rockstar into her bed as a reward. She drinks some wine on a not so empty stomach, Theon rescues Yara while Euron is doin the dirty, and Qyburn ruins Bronn’s nut by asking him to go North and murder his good ol’ pals Tyrion and Jamie.
To the dismay of Sansa and the Northern Lords, Jon arrives at Winterfell with his new Dragon Queen and all her armies (the dreadlocked one and the one without dicks). For the rest of the episode Sansa, Arya, Lyanna Mormont and Sir Royce star in Mean Girls 2, giving the cold shoulder to Daenerys despite the fact that her armies just blessed the North with it’s only chance of survival.
Sansa has morphed into a terrifying mix of Littlefinger and Catelyn, showing off her sharp wordplay against Tyrion and deep loyalty to her family in her treatment of Jon and Daenerys. Arya big dicks the Hound and flirts with Gendry as she asks him to give her a big pointy spear (wink), Jon and Daenerys ride dragons (then each other) and Sam gets the news about his flame grilled father and brother….from the woman who just flame grilled his father and brother.
In the last ten minutes of the episode, Sam tells Jon he’s the son of Lyanna Stark and Rhaegar Targaryen, which he takes relatively well, then Sam urges Jon to take the Throne instead of Daenerys because he would make a better monarch.
Tormund and Beric meet up with the last of the Night’s Watch at the Umber’s castle, the Last Hearth. Here they are greeted by the undead Umber child pinned to the wall in the center of a swirling collage of body-less limbs. Beric tells us its a message from the Night King, then lights the little zombie boy and his backdrop of limbs up with his flaming sword ( I heard Ye is planning a similar stunt on the Yhandi tour).
Last, but certainly not least, Jaime Lannister makes it to Winterfell to be greeted by Bran, the creepy oracle boy he pushed out of a window 7 seasons ago.
What this means moving forward @KingsLanding
There’s one message that all the scenes in King’s Landing displayed very, very clearly. Cersei is fucking scheming. If you thought Cersei was just going to sit back placidly until the Night King or living won the battle in the North, you haven’t been paying attention.
In a completely terrifying scene we see Cersei smile with pleasure and utter, “Good...” when she learns the dead are marching South past The Wall. Cersei seems to have complete confidence in her currently unknown plan she made to defeat whoever wins in the North, living or dead.
If its the dead, maybe we will see Cersei lure them into King’s Landing then blow it up, murdering all the living citizens of the city along with the Night King’s army. If it’s the living, we might see a final battle between the Golden Company and the survivors of the Night King’s attack.
Cersei also sleeps with Euron, a man she’s not traditionally or ancestrally fond of, to try and ensure his loyalty. However, from a conversation between Euron and Yara directly before, we see that Euron’s goal is to “Fuck the Queen,” and now that he has gotten what he wants he may abandon her.
This aligns with another theory that predicts Cersei fucked up in her repaying of the Iron bank, because now that they have gotten their gold back they are free to financially back another side of the fray.
Lastly, Cersei offers Bronn a wife, castle, and riches to go North and murder Jaime and Tyrion. Although Bronn’s always been a Bread Before Bros guy in the past, we may see him abandon this task to side with the two men who have been his true friends for the past seven seasons.
Cersei is making big moves to stay on the Iron Throne, but from our point of view it’s looking like she may have just set herself up for three game changing betrayals. If the Iron Bank stops paying the Golden Company for her, Euron leaves with the Iron Fleet and Bronn decides not to kill Jaime and Tyrion, Cersei will have been cornered with no more allies to save her.
The last time she was in a position of ally-less desperation, she blew up the Sept of Baelor. Now with an unborn baby to protect, she may do something even more evil and drastic.
Q’s for next week
Which of these players will remain loyal to Cersei: Euron, Bronn, Iron Bank, Golden Company?
What are Cersei’s “other plans for the dragon queen”?
How does Cersei plan to deal with the dead?
Does Euron give that good dick?
What this means moving forward @Winterfell
The way Jon Snow deals with the truth of his identity will set the path of the rest of the series. While his own reaction to the news was rather predictable, the other characters' reactions won’t be quite as foreseeable.
Daenerys, his lover, Queen, and Aunt simultaneously may turn on him because she thinks he is a threat to her claim to the Throne. Or she may try to use this information to ally him with her against Sansa and the North. It could also estrange Jon from Arya, Sansa and the rest of the Northern Lords.
There is foreshadowing in this episode that Jon will still respect Daenerys’ claim to the throne, until it’s too late. Despite Sam telling Jon that he would be a better monarch because of his knack for mercy, Jon most likely will not flip on his pledge to serve Daenerys just because he is the rightful king. He may end their relationship because she’s his aunt, but as we saw in the Season 7 finale Jon always tries to stay true to his word, and he pledged himself to Queen Daenerys of House Targaryen. For now he will keep that pledge.
However, we know that Daenerys has a tendency to act rash and harsh, like crucifying the masters or burning the Tarly’s. Jon loves her, he doesn’t want to betray her and certainly doesn’t want to be King, but if she puts him in a position to choose between doing what is right or betraying the woman he loves, based on past decisions Jon will do what is right.
In the scene where Jon and Daenerys walk through the Winterfell grounds, Daenerys makes an ominous statement about Sansa’s disrespectful attitude, “She doesn’t have to be my friend. But I am her Queen. If she can’t respect me…” before her statement is cut short.
Could Daenerys really have been about to threaten Sansa to Jon’s face? Tensions are high between the two powerful women, and if Daenerys threatens Sansa’s life (or takes it), then this could be what forces Jon to turn against Dany and become who he was always meant to be, King of the Seven kingdoms.
This also aligns with the prophecy of Azhor Ahai, who forged “Light Bringer” (the flaming sword he used to end the long night) by stabbing his love NIssa Nissa through the heart. If Daenerys acts against Sansa, Jon may kill her and fulfill this prophecy. Jon having to murder the woman he loves to bring peace to the 7 kingdoms would certainly be the “bittersweet” ending George R.R. Martin promised us.
In other foreshadowing news, the weapon Arya asked Gendry to make may play a big role in the upcoming battle. Is it a weapon to try and take down the Night King and Viserion? Or does she just want a staff because her time in the House of White and Black has made her skilled with them? Or maybe she just wanted an excuse to see Gendry (a man can dream okay).
Jaime’s awkward eye contact with Bran was a poetic callback to the original episode, however we did see him fighting the dead in the show’s trailer. This means he will be spared despite the harsh words Dany threw at him in the preview for next week’s episode. This could be because Bran knows Jaime will play an important role in the upcoming fight.
Overall, despite tensions being high and characters heading towards head on collisions with each other, we may see most of the activity at Winterfell in Season 8 Episode 2 be preparation for the battle against the dead.
Q’s for Episode 2
How will Brann treat Jaime?
Will Sansa and Dany clash?
Will Jon tell Daenerys/His siblings about his true parentage?
What is Arya’s weapon for?
Moving Forward With The Night King and White Walkers @YoGrannysHouse
Not much changed with Night King in the premiere episode. We didn’t see his character or the army of the dead at all which just left me even more thirsty for some Night King death glares. However, Tormund, Beric and Edd’s experience at The Last Hearth is still worth diving into.
When Beric sees Little Ned Umber staked to the wall along with the swirl of limbs, he says that it is a message from the Night King. Taken at face value this message would be, “Yo I’m here and ready to fuck y'all up” but it could mean more.
In the very first scene of the series we see the Walkers leave behind another symbol made of body parts, then a undead child shows up moments later. The swirl can also be seen spiraling around the Weirwood tree that the Children of the Forest used to make the first White Walker, or at the Fist of the First Men made out of horse parts. Lastly, in the Night King’s first scene we see him turn one of Craster’s babies into a White Walker (not a wight) in the center of a circle made of ice pillars.
“Azhor Ahai”, “The Last Hero”, or “The Prince Who Was Promised” is the person who ended the long night the first time it happened. It is prophesied that this person will be “reborn amidst salt and smoke” to end the long night when it comes again, leading many to believe this will be Jon or Dany.
However, there is no actual recorded history of the first long night, just legend. It is possible that it has been distorted over the years, and that the “Last Hero” didn’t actually defeat the White Walkers, but instead made some sort of truce with them. It is clear that the White Walkers need human babies to create more of themselves, so what if the Prince Who Was Promised is more literal than legends have made it seem. What if the “Last Hero” or “Azhor Ahi” literally promised the White Walkers a Prince, and now they have come to claim what is theirs.
The White Walker’s symbols (a circle with the line through it and the spiral) are seemingly connected to sacrifice. The man who became the first White Walker was sacrificed in the middle of one, and so was Craster’s baby. Little Ned Umber staked to the middle of this symbol could be the White Walkers way of telling humans that they are coming for the sacrifice they were promised. Maybe this sacrificial prince is even meant to be changed into a new Night King.
If this is what the Prince Who was Promised means, its anyone’s guess who that will turn out to be. Craster had 99 sons, maybe the 100th (Little Sam) was supposed to be this promised prince. Or maybe it could still refer to Dany or Jon. It could even refer to their future baby. Only 5 more weeks until we find out.
Q’s for the Night King
Tf do you want bro?